Jan
26
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Myrtle Beach Trips - Golf Courses in Myrtle Bea
Myrtle Beach Trips - Golf Courses in Myrtle Bea5 min Myrtle Beach area golf courses by Myrtle Beach Trips. Grande Dunes - This dramatic design delivers panoramic views of the Waterway and the maritime forest. Farmstead Golf Links - the Grand Strand\’s only par 6 hole! Golfers tee off to a wide sweeping fairway, then finish on a green across the North Carolina border. Meadowlands Golf Course - This beautifully wooded 7045 yard course offers five sets of tees and large, manicured greens. Myrtlewood Palmetto - Traditional architectu…
Wed, 31 Dec 1969 16:00:00 PST
14th December 2007 - Milan
some waited with the bags. When I came outta the toilet, the wheelchair was there, together with some other things like golf bags, surfboards and prams. We pushed it to the few who were waiting with the bags, and those few went to the toilet. And then we were through customs. Didn’t have to put bags through scanners or anything, which was a breeze and AWESOME for us. Imagine 13 bags ok!!! And three… trolleys. And immediately when we went to the belt, it started moving and bags were coming. One
Sat, 26 Jan 2008 13:53:32 GMT
nike golf shoes suppliers,nike golf shoes manufacturers
Search sell-offer.com for nike golf shoes,Browse to Find nike golf shoes Sellers, nike golf shoes Suppliers, nike golf shoes Wholesalers, nike golf shoes distributors,nike golf shoes Manufacturers,nike golf shoes Exporters,China nike …
Open Question: in state of FL. if you can prove a persn lied to police on police report. is this obstr.of justice?& penlty is
i was sucker punched at a poker game hosted by a golf club. by an employee not on clock. manger and next dr nieghbor!!just got job and couldnt loose it so they are covering it up by saying i got soooo drunk….blaaa but then he had to cover letting awasted guy drive home so he said he drove me home!!! to police
well when i got home i wasnt in the best of moods and slammed car door his wife ran outside yelling to me wheres joey! wheres joey! and thier next door nieghbors will testify that he was never heard. i told her he was at club so im pretty sure she went inside and called him. which would further prove his bs. and this jerk begged and cried to me not to call the police that night and he would take care of it in the morning and get the guy fired etc.. and used the time to build a story against me!!! ps due to security cam (employee knew where to hit me) i was out for a half an hr!! they say i played cards. there are some sik people out there and i have one that moved next door
Sat, 26 Jan 2008 14:31:11 GMT
A Revolution in Golf Clubs
The golf club of today, is not your Daddy’s golf club! In days past you had your choice of 5-6 major brand names, you did not have a lot of choice about how your clubs were made, how they were fitted,…
Fri, 25 Jan 2008 17:23:39 EST
Jan
26
Filed Under Golf Courses | Comments Off
5-year-old to participate in 2 FBR events
year-old to participate in 2 FBR events Five-year-old Kyle Lograsso who has made national headlines with his Tiger Woods-like golf swing and his battle with cancer will participate in two events at next week’s FBR Open. Kyle has been named the honorary chairman for the R.S.
Sat, 26 Jan 2008 00:00:00 EST
Costa De Almeria Tourist Guide And Information
On the southern coast of mainland Spain, the Costa de Almeria is the perfect beach holiday destination with fantastic sand and shingle beaches lining the coastline, and excellent resort centres dotted…
Fri, 25 Jan 2008 00:04:54 EST
Callaway Golf Company To Broadcast Fourth Quarter & Full Year 2007 …
Forbes - Callaway Golf Company, which celebrates its 25th Anniversary in 2007, manufactures and sells golf clubs and golf balls, and sells golf accessories, under the Callaway Golf(R), Odyssey(R), Top-Flite(R), and Ben Hogan(R) brands in more than 110 …
Thu, 24 Jan 2008 18:50:00 GMT
Clay Aiken’s Golf Tournament, Part 5: Hanging with Mr. Aiken!
Clay Aiken’s Golf Tournament, Part 5: Hanging with Mr. Aiken!“You were here all day! I had no idea you were Leslie. If I known you were here we could have talked sooner,” Clay Aiken said, shaking my hand as I sat down to interview him in a small room at Mirasol Country Club. It’s true: I had been hanging about the Golfing For Inclusion Tournament, to benefit …Read the full post from Leslie Gray Streeter
via Blogdigger blog search for golf clubs.
Tue, 8 Jan 2008 06:56:14 EST
Crips and Bloods on life at Sundance
Crips and Bloods on life at Sundance January 25th, 2008 Crips and Bloods on life at Sundance Salon - It stars Maria Bello as a woman who flees her twitchy, golf-zombie husband (Rufus Sewell) for a guy she?s met on the the snowstorm early on Monday morning and gave birth to a healthy baby girl in Salt Lake City at 6 a.m. (The vital statistics The day the women walked Globe and Mail - A more recent Statistics Canada census pegs the number of residents at 760, a figure that town officials hope
Fri, 25 Jan 2008 01:45:55 -0800
Jan
25
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From the Editor :
CricketLine.com - What would you do in the selectors’ shoes? Not too much else going on but there’s always a debate to spark so go ahead and … sportinglife.com | Betting Zone | TEAMtalk.com | Rivals.net Football 365 | Cricket 365 | Golf 365 | Fixtures 365 | Extreme …
Wed, 23 Jan 2008 22:33:00 GMT
Cheap Discount Golf Equipment at LOW prices
Golfballs.co.uk Launch Valentines Day Golf Gift Service
The UKs leading supplier of personalised golf equipment has now launched a limited edition range of Golf Balls for Valentines Day from its website www.golfballs.co.uk. (I-Newswire) - The UKs leading supplier of personalised golf equipment has now launched a limited edition range of Golf Balls for Valentines Day from its website All golf balls can be personalised with a special message and your choice of Valentines …
Fri, 25 Jan 2008 00:00:00 EST
Philadelphia Inquirer, The - On Golf | The course was great, but the golfer . . .
April 15, 2007 — AUGUSTA, Ga. - It was not the way I wanted to end my round at Augusta National. Monday morning, the day after the Masters. Having started on the back…
Sun, 15 Apr 2007 07:00:00 GMT
Nike Golf- 2007 SP-5 III Golf Shoes
You want a high quality golf shoe with out the cost!? Look no further. The Nike SP-5 III contains Max Air and Nike’s Power Channel! They also feature a medial push plate that flexes independently from the rest of the outsole to keep the driving surface of your rear foot grounded longer for more power on your swing. Features: Max Air Cushioning Traction At 5 Outsole Stinger Q-Lok Spikes 2 Year Waterproof Warranty
Apparel:
Company: Nike Golf
List Price: $110.00
Amazon Price:
Jan
25
Filed Under Golf Techniques | Comments Off
PALM SPRINGS Golf Lite SUNDAY Carry Bag BLUE & Black
US $10.79 (0 Bid) End Date: Friday Jan-25-2008 1:23:26 PSTBid now | Add to watch list
Tue, 22 Jan 2008 01:23:26 PST
Golf Golfing balls novelty print 6 Pack Novelty Sniff Sniff Tissues (10 per pack) 4 ply unscented
Why use plain tissue when these fun designs can be used instead! Show off flair and personality with these unique novelty print tissues!
Health and Beauty:
Why use plain tissue when these fun ones are available!, Great gifts, come in a 6 pack, each pack has 10 tissues, Stocking stuffer, small gift, teachers, school, fundraisers and more, Many different designs available, Unscented
Company: PPD
List Price:
Amazon Price: $9.99
Operation Fruitcake - I.F.R.U.I.T.E. Golf Club Experiment
Operation Fruitcake - I.F.R.U.I.T.E. Golf Club ExperimentOperationFruitcake3 min - Dec 12, 2007This video comes to us from the esteemed Institute for Fruitcake Research, Unintended Technology and Experimentation, or I.F.R.U.I.T.E., at Virginia Wesleyan College. In this experiment, Doctors Edward Clark and Cameron McDonald investigate the destructive effects of hitting fruitcake with various golf clubs. Remember, don\’t try this at home. These are trained professionals. Check out www.operationfruitcake.com for more fun and unusual ways to dispose of this unwanted holiday creation.
Wed, 12 Dec 2007 13:37:54 PST
“Las Vegas” - Gambling, Golf and Good Times !
In my previous writings I spoke about my Myrtle Beach and Disneyworld golf vacations, which are two excellent choices for golf and vacation destinations, no two ways about it. I had been alternating b…
Wed, 23 Jan 2008 18:26:56 EST
Get connected to Illinois
All the latest articles on Illinois Newest Illinois donor registry list continues to show growth (Herald & Review) Thu, 24 Jan 2008 06:43:47 GMT SPRINGFIELD - More than 3 million people have signed up for Illinois’ two-year-old organ and tissue donor registry. Late free throws down Southern Illinois (Chicago Tribune) Thu, 24 Jan 2008 04:58:52 GMT Dale Lamberth hit two free throws with 1.7 seconds left to lead Missouri State to a 63-62 win over rival Southern Illinois on Wednesday night. In
Thu, 24 Jan 2008 01:04:00 -0800
Jan
24
Filed Under Golf Courses | Comments Off
Keep Your Head Down
Interesting golf joke, instruction and clone clubs
Golf anyone?
Golf anyone?Are you a golfer? You?ll soon be able to become a member of the worlds longest course. The new course will span Australias iconic Nullarbor Plain. Nullarbor Links is an 18-hole golf course spanning 1,365km and crossing two states of the Australian outback. The Nullarbor Links concept i…Read the full post from RodneyOlsen.netTags: , Life, GOLF, Football, Cycling, Australia, nullarbor, Nullarbor Links
via Blogdigger blog search for golf courses.
Tue, 15 Jan 2008 22:00:00 EST
JOKE OF THE DAY
… and told his lover to take his shoes outside and rub them in the grass and dirt. He put on his shoes and drove home….
Fri, 18 Jan 2008 22:33:00 EDT
Off to Monterey
… alore, some of the best restaurant dining around and some of the world’s most renowned golf courses….
Fri, 18 Jan 2008 20:51:19 EDT
A Little Bit Like Goldilocks, A Lot Like That Woody Allen Movie
Title: A Little Bit Like Goldilocks, A Lot Like That Woody Allen Movie
Author: Tzzzz
Category: Sla
Thu, 24 Jan 2008 02:15:36 EDT
Jan
24
Filed Under Golf Courses | Comments Off
M2 Presswire - Fundamental Review for Callaway Golf Co.
June 13, 2007 — M2 PRESSWIRE-13 June 2007-Large Cap News: Fundamental Review for Callaway Golf Co.(C)1994-2007 M2 COMMUNICATIONS LTD RDATE:13062007 Big Bertha…
Wed, 13 Jun 2007 07:00:00 GMT
Open Question: Queenstown, New Zealand?
Im an Aussie. When I finish school, instead of going to our traditional ?schoolies? (bit like spring break for americans), I want to go to Queenstown in NZ because you can have just as much fun and drink as much booze as you want with your mates….
Sat, 03 Nov 2007 00:38:19 GMT
2008 Goals
Of course, the only things I want to explore during the tropical vacation are golf courses, open air beach-side bars and crystal clear ocean water….
Sat, 19 Jan 2008 23:59:00 EDT
Palm Springs Iron Set Golf Clubs
US $9.99 (0 Bid) End Date: Thursday Jan-24-2008 13:03:30 PSTBid now | Add to watch list
Thu, 17 Jan 2008 13:03:30 PST
Hartmann Golf Shoe Bag - $85.00
Measures 7-1/2 inches long x 15 inches tall x 4-3/4 inches deep Made of nylon and leather Accommodates one pair of men’s or women’s golf shoes Front shall pocket is perfect for score cards, tees, keys, or anything else small Features a…
Thu, 24 Jan 2008 00:00:00 GMT
Jan
23
Filed Under Golf Clubs | Comments Off
Police blotter
Two Notch Road, 10000 block: A woman called police at 3 p.m. Wednesday after she realized she was the victim of a money scam.
Wed, 23 Jan 2008 05:14:00 GMT
Puma Golf Cat Shoes - $49.99
Puma Golf Cat Shoes are designed for today’s golfer looking for comfort, style and support. The Golf Cat Shoes feature a full rubber spikeless outsole so you can make your fashion statement both on and off the course. Features both smooth…
Mon, 21 Jan 2008 00:00:00 GMT
Golf Digest Names Old Corkscrew Golf Club to List of 2007 Best New Courses (PRWeb)
Golf Digest magazine, the nation’s number one golf publication, has recognized Old Corkscrew Golf Club in Estero, Florida placing it on its prestigious list of America’s Best New Courses. (PRWeb Jan 16, 2008) Post Comment:Trackback URL: http://www.prweb.com/pingpr.php/RmFsdS1IYWxmLVNpbmctVGhpci1Mb3ZlLVplcm8=
Wed, 16 Jan 2008 08:13:54 GMT
W. Van dog owners barking mad
A summer of heavy ticketing has led West Vancouver dog owners to petition council for a more dog-friendly district.
Wed, 23 Jan 2008 07:47:05 GMT
Blog about golf
Jan
23
Filed Under Golf Tips | Comments Off
American Tourister Large Trunk Organizer - Red
Large Front Pocket to keep all those things from rolling up to the front of the vehicle. Keeps everything in one easy to get to space! Trunk Organizer - Red/Tan Description: This organizer is made of thick durable fabric and has velcro strips to secure it in place. It has multiple pockets and compartments to help keep vehicles organized. It measures 14″ tall, 16″ deep, and 12″ wide.
:
Multiple pockets and compartments, Help keep vehicles organized, Secure Stips on bottom of Trunk Organizer, Attaches to Vehicle Floor, Easy-access main compartment
Company: American Tourister
List Price: $49.99
Amazon Price: $24.95
Paking garage longboarding
Longboarding in the SD parking garage with some of the super duper skate squad.
Author: debakkerc
Keywords: longboard parking garage yes funny good fall long tall tennis hockey golf fat kids run sex babe tv ceramics shoes pool
Added: January 17, 2008
Thu, 17 Jan 2008 20:51:01 -0800
Golf-Auctions.com is dedicated to finding you the best golf deals online. We scour the internet using sites like eBay & aMazon.com to find the best golf deals around on golf equipment, golf clubs, golf balls, golf shoes, golf carts & more.
eBay & aMazon.com to find the best golf deals around on golf equipment, golf clubs, golf balls, golf shoes, golf carts & more.
Independent on Sunday, The - GOOD GEAR - GOLF SHOES: Walk tall, swing true
March 28, 2004 — A good golf game starts at the feet. An average player can take up to 11,000 steps during a single round, which really can make for “a good walk…
Sun, 28 Mar 2004 08:00:00 GMT
jim2.wmv
Click Here to view sample IGA Lesson 1 Length 1min 46sec Size 511Kb Click Here to view sample IGA Lesson 2 Length 2min 58sec Size 839Kb
Jan
22
Filed Under Golf Clubs | Comments Off
Resolved Question: Collection of jokes?
Collection of jokes
There was a guy riding through the desert on his camel. He had been travelling so long that he felt the need to have sex. Obviously there were no women in the desert so the man turned to his camel.
He tried to position himself to have sex with his camel but the camel ran away. The man ran to catch up to the camel and got back on and started to ride again. Soon he was feeling the urge to have sex again so once again he turned to his camel. The camel refused by running away. So he caught up to it again and got on it again.
Finally after riding the camel through the whole desert the man came to a road. There was a broken down car with three big chested beautiful blondes sitting in it.
He went up to them and asked the women if they needed any help.
The hottest girl said , “If you fix our car we will do anything you want.”
The man luckily knew a thing or two about cars and fixed it in a flash.
When he finished are three girls asked, “How could we ever repay you Mr.”
After thinking for a short while he replied, “Could you hold my camel?”
A pianist was hired to play background music for a movie. When it was completed he asked when and where he could see the picture. The producer sheepishly confessed that it was actually a porno film and it was due out in a month.
A month later, the musician went to a porno theatre to see it. With his collar up and dark glasses on, he took a seat in the back row, next to a couple whom also seemed to be in disguise.
The movie was even raunchier than he had feared, featuring group sex, S/M and even a dog.
After a while, the embarrassed pianist turned to the couple and said, “I’m only here to listen to the music.”
“Yeah?” replied the man. “We’re only here to see our dog.”
A man is in a hotel lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question. As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast.
They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and says, “Ma’am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you’ll forgive me.”
She replies, “If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I’m in room 436.”
A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5, 000 and feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper.
Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?”
“About 35, ” was the reply.
“I’m actually 47, ” the man says happily.
A little while later he goes to McDonald’s for lunch and asks the order taker the same question, to which the reply is, “I’d guess that you’re 29?”
“Nope, I am actually 47.” He’s starting to feel really good about himself.
While standing at the bus stop he asks an old woman the same question.
She replies, “I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young there was a sure way of telling a man’s age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with your penis for ten minutes I will be able to tell your exact age.”
As there was no one else around the man thought what the hell and let her slip her hand down his pants.
Ten minutes later the old lady says, “OK, it’s done. You are 47, ”
Stunned the man says, “That was brilliant! How did you do that?”
The old lady replies, “I was behind you in McDonald’s”.
A young couple on the brink of divorce visits a marriage counselor. The counselor asks the wife what is the problem.
She responds ” My husband suffers from premature ejaculation.”
The counselor turns to her husband and inquires “Is that true?”
The husband replies “Well not exactly, it’s her that suffers not me.”
A little girl came running into the house crying and miserable from a small cut she just received. She asked her mom for a glass of cider.
“Why do you want cider?” asked Mom.
“To take the pain away, ” sobbed the little girl.
Tired of all the tears, Mom poured her a glass.
The little girl immediately put her hand into the drink.
“It doesn’t work!” she yelled.
“What do you mean?” asked Mom.
“Well, ” sniffed the little girl, “I overheard my sister say that whenever she gets a prick in her hand, she can’t wait to get it in cider.”
A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back, and had nothing left but a quarter and the second half of his round trip ticket — If he could just get to the airport he could get himself home. So he went out to the front of the casino where there was a cab waiting.
He got in and explained his situation to the cabbie. He promised to send the driver money from home, he offered him his credit card numbers, his drivers license number, his address, etc. but to no avail. The cabbie said (adopt appropriate dialect), “If you don’t have fifteen dollars, get the hell out of my cab!” So the businessman was forced to hitch-hike to the airport and was barely in time to catch his flight.
One year later the businessman, having worked long and hard to regain his financial success, returned to Vegas and this time he won big. Feeling pretty good about himself, he went out to the front of the casino to get a cab ride back to the airport.
Well who should he see out there, at the end of a long line of cabs, but his old buddy who had refused to give him a ride when he was down on his luck. The businessman thought for a moment about how he could make theguy pay for his lack of charity, and he hit on a plan.
The businessman got in the first cab in the line, “How much for a ride to the airport, ” he asked? “Fifteen bucks, ” came the reply. “And how much for you to give me a blowjob on the way?” “What?! Get the hell out of my cab.” The businessman got into the back of each cab in the long line and asked the same questions, with the same result.
When he got to his old friend at the back of the line, he got in and asked “How much for a ride to the airport?” The cabbie replied “fifteen bucks.” The businessman said “ok” and off they went. Then, as the drove slowly past the long line of cabs the businessman gave a big smile and thumbs up sign to each driver.
John woke up one morning immensely aroused so he turned over to his wife’s side of the bed. His wife, Heather, had already awakened though, and she was downstairs preparing breakfast in the kitchen. Afraid that he might spoil things by getting up, John called his little boy into the room and asked him to’ Bring this note to your beautiful Mummy.’ The note read:
The Tent Pole Is Up,
The Canvas Is Spread,
The Hell With Breakfast,
Come Back To Bed.
Heather, grinning, answered the note and then asked her son to ‘Bring this to your silly Daddy.’ The note read:
Take The Tent Pole Down,
Put The Canvas Away,
The Monkey Had A Hemorrhage,
No Circus Today.
John read the note and quickly scribbled a reply. Then, he asked his son to take it back to ‘The lady in the kitchen’. The note read:
The Tent Pole’s Still Up,
And The Canvas Still Spread,
So Drop What You’re Doing,
And Come Give Me Some Head.
Laughing, Heather answered the note and then asked her son to ‘Take this to the poor man upstairs’. The note read:
I’m Sure That Your Pole’s
The Best In The Land.
But I’m Busy Right Now,
So Do It By Hand!
Two 90 year olds had been dating for a while, when the man told the woman, “Well, tonight’s the night we have sex!”
And so they did.
As they are lying in bed afterward, the man thinks to himself, “My God, if I knew she was a virgin, I would have been much more gentle with her!”
And the woman was thinking to herself, “My God, if I knew the old geezer could actually get it up, I would have taken off my panty hose!”
There was this construction worker on the 3rd floor of this unfinished building. He needed a hand saw, but was too lazy to go down and get it himself, so he tried to call his fellow worker on the ground to get it for him, but this guy could not hear a word he said. So he started to give a sign so the guy on the ground could understand him.
First he pointed at his eyes (meaning “I”) then pointed at his knees (meaning “need), and moved his hand back and forth describing the movement of a hand saw.
Finally, the guy on the ground started nodding his head like he understood and dropped his pants and started to jerk off.
The guy on the 3rd floor got pissed-off and ran down to the ground and started yelling at this guy, “You idiot, I was trying to tell you I needed a hand saw.”
The other guy replied, “I know, I was trying to tell you that I was coming.”
A couple were having financial problems until finally they couldn’t stand it any more. The husband said to his wife that is was necessary for her to make some money through prostitution to get by.
So the husband drove her to the place where she had to do the job and in the evening he picked her up again.
“So, how much have you earned today?” the husband asked.
“Well”, the woman responded, “I’ve made one hundred dollars and fifty cents.”
“That’s strange”, the husband responded, “who gave you the fifty cents?”
Said the woman: “All of them, of course!”
Steve is shopping for a new motorcycle. He finally finds one for a great price, but it’s missing a seal, so whenever it rains he has to smear vaseline over the spot where the seal should be.
Anyway, his girlfriend is having him over for dinner to meet her parents. He drives his new bike to her house, where she is outside waiting for him.
“No matter what happens at dinner tonight, don’t say a word.” She tells him, “Our family had a fight a while ago about doing dishes. We haven’t done any since, but the first person to speak at dinner has to do them.”
Steve sits down for dinner and it is just how she described it. Dishes are piled up to the ceiling in the kitchen, and nobody is saying a word. So Steve decides to have a little fun. He grabs his girlfriend, throws her on the table and has sex with her in front of her parents.
His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word. A few minutes later he grabs her mom, throws her on the table and does a repeat performance. Now his girlfriend is furious, her dad is boiling, and her mother is a little happier.
But still there is complete silence at the table. All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain. Steve remembers his motorcycle. He jumps up and grabs his jar of vaseline.
Upon witnessing this, his girlfriend’s father backs away from the table and screams, “OKAY, ENOUGH ALREADY, I’LL DO THE FUCKING DISHES”
The doc told him that masturbating before sex often helped men last longer during the act. The man decided, “What the hell, I’ll try it, “He spent the rest of the day thinking about where to do it. He couldn’t do it in his office. He thought about the restroom, but that was too open. He considered an alley, but figured that was too unsafe.Finally, he realized his solution. On his way home, he pulled his truck over on the side of the highway. He got out and crawled underneath as if he was examining the truck. Satisfied with the privacy, he undid his pants and started to masturbate.
He closed his eyes and thought of his lover. As he grew closer to orgasm, he felt a quick tug at the bottom of his pants. Not wanting to lose his mental fantasy or the orgasm, he kept his eyes shut and replied, “What?” He heard, “This is the police. What’s going on down there?” The man replied, “I’m checking out the rear axle, it’s busted.” Came the reply, “Well, you might as well check your brakes too while you’re down there because your truck rolled down the hill 5 minutes ago.”
Doctor, the embarrassed man said, ‘I have a sexual problem. I can’t get it up for my wife anymore.’ ‘Mr. Thomas, bring her back with you tomorrow and let me see what I can do.’ So, the worried fellow returned with his wife the following pad. The doctor greeted the coupled and then said, ‘Please remove your clothes, Mrs. Thomas.’ The woman obliged and removed her clothing. ‘Okay, now turn all the way around… Now, lie down please… Uh-huh, I see. Alright, you can put your clothes back on.’ While the woman was busy dressing herself again, the doctor took the husband aside. ‘You’re in perfect health,’ he said to the man. ‘Your wife didn’t give me an erection either.’
Jack and his friends were playing golf one Saturday. As they are getting ready to tee off, a guy walks up and asks if he can join them. The friends look at each other, look at the guy and say, ‘Sure.’ About two holes into the game, the friends get curious about what the guy does for a living. So they ask him. The stranger tells them he’s a hitman. They all laugh. The guy says, ‘No really, I am a hitman. My gun is in my golf bag. I carry it everywhere. You can take a look at it if you like.’ So Jack decides to check it out. He opens the bag and, sure enough, there is a rifle with a huge scope attached. Jack gets all excited and says, ‘WOW! I bet I can see my house through here! May I look?’ The hit man replies, ‘Sure.’ So Jack looks and says, ‘YEAH! You can see my house! I can even see through the windows into my bedroom. There’s my wife. Wait, there’s my next door neighbor! And he’s naked too!’ This really upsets Jack so he asks how much it would be for a hit. The hitman replies, ‘I get $1000 every time I pull the trigger.’ Jack responds, ‘$1000? Well, OK, I want two hits. I want you to shoot my wife right in the mouth. She’s always nagging at me and I can’t stand it. Second, I want you to shoot my neighbor in the penis, just for screwing around with my wife.’ The hit man agrees, gears up and looks through the scope. He’s looking for about five minutes until finally Jack starts to get really impatient and asks, ‘What are you waiting for? The hitman replies, ‘Relax….. I’m about to save you a thousand bucks!’
A little boy goes up to his father and asks: ‘Dad, what’s the difference between hypothetical and reality?’
The father replies: ‘Well son, I could give you the book definitions, but I feel it could be best to show you by example. Go upstairs and ask your mother if she’d have sex with the mailman for $500, 000.’
The boy goes and asks his mother: ‘Mom, would you have sex with the mailman for $500, 000?’ The mother replies: ‘Hell yes I would!’
The little boy returns to his father: ‘Dad, she said ‘Hell yes I would!” The father then says: ‘Okay, now go and ask your older sister if she’d have sex with her principal for $500, 000.’
The boy asks his sister: ‘Would you have sex with your principal for $500, 000?’ The sister replies: ‘Hell yes I would!’
He returns to his father: ‘Dad, she said ‘Hell yes I would!” The father answers: ‘Okay son, here’s the deal: Hypothetically, we’re millionaires, but in reality, we’re just living with a couple of whores.’
A young guy drops off his girlfriend at her home after being out together on a date. When they reach the front door he leans up against the house with one hand and says to her, “How about a blowjob?”
“What! Are you crazy!”
“Don’t worry, it will be quick, ” he ensures his girlfriend.
“No! Someone might see us…”
“It’s just a small blowjob, ” he insists, “and I know you like it.”
“No! I said no!”
“Baby… don’t be like that.”
“Come on baby pleeeeaassseee”
“I’m not going to give you a blow job”
“Why Not…baby it will be quick I promise?”
Suddenly, the girl’s younger sister shows up at the door in her nightgown, with her hair a mess, and rubbing her eyes. She looks at them and smirks, “Dad says either you blow him, I blow him, or he’ll come downstairs and blow the guy himself… but for God’s sake tell your boyfriend to take his hand off the intercom.”
Little Tommy runs into the bathroom one day to find his mother taking a bath. He points at her bush and asks, ‘What’s that Mommy? ‘A little embarrassed, she tells him that is her sponge. Tommy is satisfied with that answer and goes back to playing with his toys. Some time later, Tommy catches his mother in the shower shortly after she has shaved her bush for bikini season. Tommy asks her, ‘Where is your sponge mommy? ‘Again embarrassed she tells him that she lost it but will probably find it soon. Tommy is a little worried and promises his mommy that he will help her find it. His mother says OK and goes back to showering. Soon, Tommy comes running back in and says that he has found his mother’s sponge.’ What do you mean you found my sponge? “The lady next door has it and she’s washing Daddy’s face with it!’
This story occurred on Melbourne radio last week. One of the FM stations has a competition where they ring someone up, ask them three personal questions, ring their spouse or partner, ask them the same three questions, if the answers are the same, the couple win an overseas holiday. Last week the competition went like this:
Presenter: Hey its XXX-FM, do you want to play the game ?
Brian: Yeah, sure.
Presenter: O.K., Question 1 - When was the last time you had sex?
Brian: Ha Ha, well, about 8 o’clock this morning.
Presenter: And how long did it go for Brian ?
Brian: Hmmmmm …. about 10 minutes.
Presenter: 10 minutes? Good one. And where did you do it?
Brian: Ohhhh , I can’t say that.
Presenter: There’s a holiday to Bali at stake here Brian !
Brian: O.K. … O.K. … On the kitchen table.
Presenter: (and others in the room - much laughter). Good one Brian, now is it O.K. for us to call your wife ?
Brian: Yeah, alright.
Presenter: Hi Sharelle, how are you ?
Sharelle: Hi. Good thanks.
Presenter: (Explains competition again) We’ve got Brian on the other line, say hello.
Sharelle: Hi Brian.
Brian: Hi Sharelle.
Presenter: Now Sharelle, we’re going to ask you the same three questions we asked Brian and if you give the same answers, you win a trip for two to Bali.
Brian: Just tell the truth Honey.
Sharelle: O.K.
Presenter: Sharelle, when was the last time you had sex ?
Sharelle: Oohhhh, noooooo. I can’t say that on radio.
Brian: Sharelle, it doesn’t matter. I’ve already told them.
Sharelle: O.K. … About 8: 00 this morning before Brian went to work.
Presenter: Good, nice start ! Next question. How long did it go for Sharelle ?
Sharelle: (giggling) About 12, maybe 15 minutes.
Co-Presenter: That’s close enough … Brian was just being a gentleman.
Presenter: O.K. Sharelle, final question. Where did you do it ?
Sharelle: Oh no I can’t say that. My mum could be listening. No way, no.
Presenter: There’s a trip to Bali on the line here.
Brian: Sharelle, I’ve already told them so it doesn’t matter anyway.. just tell em.
Sharelle: Ohhhh …. alright …. Up the ass !
Radio Silence
A little guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this HUGE guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little guy staring at him, looks down and says, “7 feet 3 inches tall, 385 pounds, 12 inch penis, 2 pound left testicle, 2 pound right testicle, Turner Brown.”
The small guy faints away and falls to the floor. The big guy kneels down and brings him to, gently slapping his face and shaking him, “Are you alright?”
In a very weak voice the little guy says, “Excuse me, but what EXACTLY did you say?”
The big dude says, “I saw the curious look on your face and figured I’d just give you the answers to the questions almost everyone always asks me. I’m 7 feet 3 inches tall, 385 pounds, 12 inch penis, 2 pound left testicle, 2 pound right testicle, and my name is Turner Brown.”
The small guy says, “Thank God! I thought you said ‘Turn Around’.
What is a four-letter word that ends in k and means the same as intercourse?
What is it that a cow has four of and a woman has only two of?
What can you find in a man’s pants that is about six inches long, has a head on it, and that women love so much that they often blow it?
What word starts with f and ends with u-c-k?
Name five words that are each four letters long, end in u-n-t, one of which is a word for a woman?
What does a dog do that you can step into?
What four letter word begins with f and ends with k, and if you can’t get one you can use your hands?
What is hard, six inches long, has two nuts, and can make a girl fat?
What four-letter word ends in i-t and is found on the bottom of birdcages?
What is it that all men have one of; it’s longer on some men than on others; the pope doesn’t use his; and a man gives it to his wife after they’re married?
ANSWERS:
1. (talk)
2. (legs)
3. (a twenty dollar bill)
4. (firetruck)
5. (bunt, hunt, runt, punt, aunt)
6. (pants)
7. (fork)
8. (Almond Joy candy bar)
9. (grit)
10. (last name)
A man who just got a raise decides to buy a new scope for his rifle. He goes to a rifle shop, and asks the clerk to show him a scope.
The clerk takes out a scope, and says to the man, “This scope is so good, you can see my house all the way up on that hill.”
The man takes a look through the scope, and starts laughing.
“What’s so funny?” asks the clerk.
“I see a naked man and a naked woman running around in the house.” the man replies.
The clerk grabs the scope from the man, and looks at his house. Then he hands two bullets to the man and says, “Here are two bullets, I’ll give you this scope for nothing if you take these two bullets, shoot my wife’s head off and shoot the guy’s dick off.”
The man takes another look through the scope and says, “You know what? I think I can do that with one shot!”
A husband, one bright sunny morning, turns to his lovely wife, “Wife, we’re going fishing this weekend, you, me and the dog.”
The wife grimaces, “But I don’t like fishing!”
“Look! We’re going fishing and that’s final.”
“Do I have to go fishing with you… I really don’t want to go!”
“Right I’ll give you three choices… 1 You come fishing with me and the dog… 2 You give me a BLOW JOB…. 3 or you take it up the ass!”
The wife grimaces again, “But I don’t want to do any of those things!”
“Wife I’ve given you three options.. You’ll HAVE to do one of them! I’m going to the garage to sort out my fishing tackle, when I come back I expect you to have made up your mind!”
The wife sits and thinks about it.
Twenty minutes later her husband comes back, “Well! What have you decided? FISHING with me and the dog, BLOW JOB, or ass?”
The wife complains some more and finally makes up her mind, “O.K. I’ll give you a blow job!”
“Great!” He says and drops his pants. The wife is on her knees doing the business. Suddenly she stops, looks up at her Husband, “Oh! It tastes absolutely disgusting… It tastes all shitty!”
“Yes!” says her husband “The dog didn’t want to go fishing either.”
A guy goes to the tattoo parlor and offers the tattoo artist $1, 000 to put a $100 bill on his willie. The artist agrees, but is curious and asks the man why he wants to do this. The man replies, ‘I have my reasons which I would rather not tell right now.’
So, the artist goes ahead and does the job. But, all the while he is anxious with curiosity over why this man wants a $100 bill on his penis.
So, he tells the man that he really needs to know the reason why and says that the man can keep the $1000 he would have paid for the tattoo if he would just tell the reason for putting a $100 bill on his willie.
So, the man consents and offers these three reasons: ‘First, I like to play with my money. Second, I like to watch my money grow. And third, and most importantly, the next time my wife wants to blow $100, she can stay home to do it.’
It was the mailman’s last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.
When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope.
At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars. The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.
At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door, and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced.
When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee.
As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup’s bottom edge. “All this was just too wonderful for words, ” he said, “but what’s the dollar for?”
“Well, ” she said, “last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you.”
He said, “Fuck him, give him a dollar.”
The lady then said, “The breakfast was my idea.”
One day a construction worker left the job a little early, and when he got home he found his wife in bed with another man. Purple with rage, he hauled the man down the stairs and into the garage where he proceeded to secure his dick in a vice.
Utterly terrified, the man screamed, “Stop, stop! you’re not going to cut it off, are you? ARE YOU?”
“Nope, ” replied the construction worker, “You are…I’m going to set the garage on fire.”‘
A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. “Damn, that was stupid, ” she thought as she fell. “What a way to die.”
As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms.
While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, “Do you suck?”
“No!” she shrieked, aghast.
So, he dropped her.
As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her. “Do you screw?” he asked.
“Of course not!” she exclaimed before she could stop herself.
He dropped her, too.
The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor. “I suck! I screw!” she screamed in panic.
“Slut!” he said, and dropped her.
A man and his wife go to their honeymoon place for their 25th anniversary.
As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband: “When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?”
The husband replied: “All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains out, and suck your tits dry.”
Then, as the wife undressed, she asked: “What are you thinking now?”
He replied: “It looks like I did a pretty good job.”
Fri, 18 Jan 2008 10:07:28 GMT
Golf clubs for women LPGA tour professionals
Golf clubs for women LPGA tour professionalswww.sashawuzhere.com37 sec - Jan 3, 2007Callaway spread out into other markets with mixed success throughout the 1990s, but remained at the forefront of consumer?s minds with TV advertisements featuring a tongue-in-cheek endorsement of Callaway Golf clubs by Bill Gates; richest man in the world and an amateur golfer with a notoriously high handicap. Other popular celebrities associated with Callaway Golf equipment included rock star Alice Cooper, an avid golfer with a very low handicap, and Celine Dion, a singer with a sweet swing to match her voice and a great game. The company?s primary developments were the introduction of Callaway Golf balls, which were a financial drain for the company but a technological success that won over the likes of legendary golfers such as Arnold Palmer and Gary Player. It should also be noted that these legendary golfers were added to the pro staff upon Callaways purchase of their respective playing equipment companies, both of which had been having financial difficulties. Callaway Golf also acquired up-and-comers in the club-making business, such as Odyssey Golf, which was known for its face insert putter technology and is now famous for its White Hot and more recently, White Hot XG, putter lines. In 2003, Callaway Golf added the Top-Flite and Ben Hogan names to its family of brands.
Wed, 03 Jan 2007 00:00:00 PST
MICKELSON DOUBTFUL FOR BUICK - Golf365.com - News - Golf News Golf Tips Tiger Woods Michelle Wie Golf Scores Golf Leaderboards Dave Tindall Blog
Mickelson’s website states that he has been “plagued by heavy congestion shortness of breath and fatigue since October. “It’s unclear whether the condition was caused by working in the smoky debris on his property following the wildfires that devastated Mickelson’s neighbourhood or by the illness he developed immediately after that in Singapore.
Tue, 22 Jan 2008 00:00:00 EST
Open Question: I saw a trailer for a movie but I can’t remember the name HELP?
Okay so it was before I watched Sweeney Todd.
Basically two guys knock on a family’s door (mom, dad, and kid in the house) and beat the dad over the head with a golf club and then bet that by the next day they will be dead. And the movie is just a cat and mouse game where the family is hunted.
Tue, 22 Jan 2008 09:50:19 GMT
Birdie Putt
Jan 20, 2008 On the golf course making my best putt of the day.
Author: aquario209
Keywords: golf putting birdie putt-putt sports bogey green clubs irons tee callaway
Added: January 20, 2008
Sun, 20 Jan 2008 20:11:22 -0800
Jan
22
Filed Under Golf Tips | Comments Off
Alaska Golf Courses on Google Earth
Golf courses that have Google Earth links in Anchorage, Elmendorf, Fairbanks, Fort Richardson, Healy, Homer, Juneau, Kenai, Kodiak, Palmer, Soldotna, Wasilla and Wrangle
FREE GOLF at OLD TRAIL GOLF COURSE. VIRGINIA
US $1.00 (0 Bid) End Date: Tuesday Jan-22-2008 6:00:21 PSTBuy It Now for only: US $39.95Bid now | Buy it now | Add to watch list
Mon, 21 Jan 2008 06:00:21 PST
Business
, which he has marketed to horse owners, wildlife parks, Iowa State Parks and golf courses, among
Tue, 22 Jan 2008 06:17:35 GMT
since I’ve been blogging
I also learned that Portugal has fourteen golf courses rated in the top one hundred in Europe….
Fri, 18 Jan 2008 21:51:00 EDT
Large Nike Jacquard Golf Towel Black Red Silver For Bag
US $10.95 (0 Bid) End Date: Tuesday Jan-22-2008 2:11:20 PSTBuy It Now for only: US $12.99Bid now | Buy it now | Add to watch list
Sat, 19 Jan 2008 12:11:25 PST
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